Lord of the Flies

I know you are expecting a Dining Room Do Over post today but I decided to do my posts in the order they happened (minus painting the ceiling).  You see while I was stenciling the kitchen, Greg started noticing flies in the kitchen.

And not the little fruit flies but the big horse fly type flies.

By the time the sun had set, he was stationed in the kitchen killing them.  When he killed one another three showed up to mourn it.   It felt like we were in The Birds but with flies.  They were attracted to our big surfboard shaped florescent light in the kitchen (sadly no picture of it up), so he took to killing them with my packet of pension papers.

Then I heard the crash.

He whacked a bug so hard with my papers, he broke the light and it came crashing down to the floor.

You also might be wondering why I keep mentioning my papers.  Greg tried to blame me for this incident.

According to him, if my pension wasn’t you big (it’s not at all), then I wouldn’t have had as many papers in the packet and the light would have never broken.

This normally would not have been an issue, just something to deal with later on. . . but we were hosting my Dad’s surprise 60th birthday party the following week and we really didn’t have a lot of wiggle room in our house plans.  Nor did we want people to see a bare florescent light.

So I powered up the laptop and started looking at light fixtures online. After an hour or two, we had a shortlist.

Good thing we were headed to Lowe’s the next morning anyway.

The following morning Greg takes down the light and sees that we have to move the wires and *shocker* there was no box for the wires.  The former owners/builders must have wanted to save $10 and decided they weren’t needed.  We now have several spares for situations just like this.

Once we entered Lowe’s, I ignored everything on shopping list (we needed dining room items) and went straight to the lighting section with our shortlist.  Most of the list got scratched off when we saw them in person (mostly due to lower light bulb wattage or size).  Then Greg saw a massive two tier light fixture that he thought would be ideal for the kitchen.

The only thing it would have been ideal for would be the entry way to a medieval castle.

While he was talking himself into a three tier chandelier, I found a fun mini chandelier for the bedroom closet.  I informed Greg we were getting it and he was installing it as punishment for destroying the kitchen light/blaming me but not anytime soon (hopefully this weekend!).

We finally settled on this light and then moved on to the rest of our purchases.

When we got home, he started on the kitchen light and I started sorting out our other purchases.

I should mention at this time, we turn off the kitchen circuit when he took the florescent light off in the morning to see what the situation was . . . about three hours ago.

As he started, I remembered that fun little fact and that I had just stocked the freezer with party items.  Assured by Mr. Fix-it, the light would take at most an hour, I went off to work on other things.

Ok, I went to cuddle with Hazel.

Needless to say one hour turned into four and we had to move the island.

Side note: everything in the fridge was fine.

Why?  Well when he went to Dremel the new light hole over the island (a task which involved lots of measure and for some reason Mr. Level), we have a piece of wood blocking the way.  So we shift it over a smidge and had to shift the island over a smidge.

Once he got the new hole carved, installed the box, and probably dealt with another issues, we installed the light.  I got to help because he needed my help holding it up while he wire the light.  About an hour later, we had success!

During the week, he patched and painted the ceiling because the cut out looked a bit too phallic for our guests to see (which I sadly do not have a picture of.)

And the bugs which started this whole debacle . . . we killed them all.  After finding out you need to clean the garbage disposal every once in a while (with a really fun kit from Lowe’s), we test it twice and the flies magically disappeared.

Side note: ice and vinegar do not clean out the garbage disposal, it’s a myth.

Now we have a grown up light fixture in the kitchen which provides great light and should hold up against any bug.


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